i don't think it's ever gonna be enough.
i have really changed alot..ok not really alot..but quite alot aft the blowup...
i helped dad...cooked food tt is still edible. did some housework....
but it's never enough. there's always dissatisfaction where either i've not done enough or not good enough.
it's just so blah.
done all i could...don't see sis doing anymore than i did.
but still getting all the crap.
can't wait for school to start seriously.
at least i get a reason to get out of this place.
now even when i go out and hav fun i'll feel guilty and everything. like i don't deserve to be let out and have fun.
whenever i ask if there's anything going on the next day so i can make sure dad have someone to prepare food everything i'll be given a look tt says you-going-out-again?!-tt's-ridiculous...
this is bullshit.

blah. woke up and went out to have lunch at Swensen's with dad and sis.
dad pangsehed us to go gossip and drink coffee with his kaki...
sadded... stayed in library to re read a book...
finally borrowed something tt looks remotely decent...
thinking of going out tmr cuz it's just so boring at home.
looking forward to friday... =)
gonna dress up and go to town with anti thurs.
hope everything goes well..but shall not anticiapte much cuz thins always suck when i anticipate too much.
and this post is getting dumber.
so bye. i shall take a look at my cafe world.
oh! not to mention i'm getting fat too. damnit.